But it Hurts
by Scales of Boredom
Summary: I should be happy and I am. Everything is going well, everyone is so happy. I'm happy too, I have someone at my side who can help me, and the one I love is with another and she's extremely happy. I'm happy for both of them. I'm happy, I really am! But it hurts. One-shot. One-sided NaLu, GrayLu, NaLi


**Summary: I should be happy and I am. Everything is going well, everyone is so happy. I'm happy too, I have someone at my side who can help me, and the one I love is with another and she's extremely happy. I'm happy for both of them. I'm happy, I really am! _But it hurts. _One-shot.**

**I just want to thank DemonxHalphas for beta-reading this!**

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"Ahaha! HAHAHA!"

I think I'm crazy. Ha-ha, it hurts. It's all I can do... laugh! I ignore the pain. "Haha!" Tears roll down my cheeks freely. Haha! IT HURTS! I laugh some more. I feel it again; I winced as the feeling makes its way through my body, choking me. I laugh it off, like it's not even there, but who am I kidding? The more I laugh the more it hurts, but, I just, I can't... I have to! I have to laugh! Even, even if it hurts the more I do it... I would keep laughing just to escape reality, just to escape this world, even if it's just for a split second, even if it's just that brief, it's enough to know that even just for a little bit, you _can_ escape this world. Oh, how I _hate_ reality, how I _hate_ the world.

It hurts really badly. I feel my heart contract; a tingling feeling spreads throughout my body and shivers as it tries to regain the heat it's lost. A warm feeling spreads inside and out then there's a lump in my throat, preventing me from breathing, suffocating me. I... I can't breathe yet I still try, I still try to laugh. Is that the emotional pain they all talk about? The pain that hurts so bad and burns like hell's never ending flames? (That would probably not taste very good.) It's an extremely uncomfortable feeling and it hurts. When the pain is at its worse you feel a pang in your heart. Sometimes your body would start to tremble uncontrollably, you could feel depression haunting you from the shadows of the pain your feeling.

"That's it." I mutter. "Laughing is not going to solve my problems." I wipe away the tears from my face.

I look up at the scarlet-filled sky, and think _how beautiful_. A few more tears escape from my eyes. I stand up and brush off the invisible dust from my clothes. I should be happy for them, right? Plus, I can play this facade longer. Long enough so that soon this pain will be nothing but a mere scar from my life. I see them pass by the park, laughing so happily, not noticing my presence at all.

"Hey." A voice says, startling me.

"Hi." I grin, acting like there's nothing wrong, but of course my face is tear-stained and pretty much gives it away.

"I know you're hurting, you don't have to hide it." _She _says. "I can tell."

My grin falls into a frown. "Yeah, I know."

_She_ looks at me, eyes full of concern. "You know I know a place where you can laugh like a maniac and scream as loud as you want?"

I look up at _her_. "Really?"

_She_ nods eagerly. "I can take you there if you want."

"I want to go!" A place where maybe, just maybe, I can escape reality.

"Let's go then!" _She_ grabs my arm and headed to who-knows-where.

* * *

"We're here!"

"Wow." Was all I manage to say. The scenery before me was beautiful.

"Come on, scream!" _she _tells me, "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!"

"Whoa." I say. "I didn't know you could be that loud."

"Ha-ha, this is where I go whenever I'm sad." _She_ had a faraway look in her eyes. "So go on, scream and laugh as loud as you want!"

And so I did.

* * *

-The Next Day-

I'm walking to the guild; it's been a few days since I've been there. I don't want them to worry, so I'll go today. I'll see those 2 again, I'm happy for them, but... it hurts.

I kick open the doors and yell, "GOOD MORNING!" In the most energetic way as possible.

I look around, and sure enough he has his arm over her shoulders, like he always does. I take another look and saw _her_ and I walk over to where _she _is.

"Good morning." _She_ says to me.

I just smile.

"Feeling better?"

"Yup."

"NAAAAAATSUUUU!"

"Eh? Lucy?"

Suddenly, I was tackled to the ground, and she smiles her beautiful smile at me. "I have to tell you something!"

"What is it?" I ask. It feels nice that I'm still her go-to guy, after that ice prick of course, but it hurts that I'm only second place when it comes to her heart.

"You're my best friend so I wanted to tell you first." I raise an eyebrow at her. "Gray proposed to me last night!"

I think I just heard my heart shatter; I'm on the verge of tears. I'm not good at handling these things but I know I can do this. And since she's happy, I should be happy too, right? But... but it hurts being happy for them.

"Natsu," her face contorted with concern. "Are you okay?"

I snap out of my thoughts and grin that, wide grin. I call it, "Natsu's Grin." I'm not good with naming things, don't judge me!

"Yeah, I'm great! It's just that I'm really happy for you, Lucy!" I say to her, with that same voice I use every day. "But," I turn my gaze to that popsicle and glare at him. "if he dares to hurt you, I _will_ kill him."

She giggles. "Thank you, Natsu!"

Gray tch'd. "I'm never going to hurt her, you freak!"

"You better not!" I retort back at him.

I take a look at Lisanna from the corner of my eye, her face full of concern. I give her a smile to assure her that I'm alright. I watch Lucy run back to Gray, him catching her and both of them sharing a passionate kiss. Apparently the whole guild heard everything, and immediately started partying and celebrating for the two lovebirds.

A few tears escape from my eyes and soon enough, I start sobbing. No one notices though; they're partying too hard to even care.

I feel a comforting hand on my shoulder. "Natsu." I look up, her eyes watering.

I wipe away those tears and smiled the smile that I haven't been using for a long time now. "I'm fine."

Lisanna suddenly hugs me. "It's okay, Natsu. I'll always be at your side."

I hug her back and cried. I should be happy and I am. Everything is going well, everyone is so happy. I'm happy too, I have someone at my side who can help me, and the one I love is with another and she's extremely happy. I'm happy for both of them. I'm happy, I really am!

_But it hurts._

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**Just a question:**

**Who did you think the character was at first?**


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